Watcher Feature - Friends Edition(Part 3)

This is one is going to be for close friends of mine this time, they're all very good artists and some of them don't get much attention.
They've all helped me out alot, and I'm lucky to have such great friends, on DA and in real life ;u;  I want to do them some good ^^

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:thumb347094722: (Still getting set up)
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A Matter of PerspectiveA Matter of Perspective
From the male perspective, shopping malls are female torture devices.
Shoes are an article of necessity and one pair fits all occasions.
Makeup is a foreign word and a hair brush a foreign concept.
Blue jeans can be worn until the stench is noticeable at five paces
And a T-shirt only needs be marginally clean.
An outing is where you can get bloody, get dirty, or get drunk
And it always ends with complaints about women.
Men can cook but they burn everything to get out of it.
Marriage is a great institution, until the novelty wears off.
Maybe Polygamists have it right?
After a fight, gifts are always a prelude to make up sex
And that is truly the only motive for it.
Men never know how why they were wrong, just that they are.
Chick flicks are only to be watched when the woman demands it
And then to reclaim your manhood, watch Bruce Willis.
Walking around the house half naked is alright – on weekends.
Yard work is an excuse to show off your manliness,
And in th Darkness to LightPain stabs away, always at my heart.
But even though I'm crying
and deep inside my soul,
I'm huddled against the shadows
trying to swallow me whole,
I face the world with a smile
and say "I'll be just fine."
They can't know the pain I feel
the pain I feel inside.
I'll be alright, I am okay
it is my litany.
Outside the world sees only joy
when all I feel is pain.
I was taught to be strong
and to be depended upon
no matter what the situation.
But eventually, the lie becomes real.
The shadows fade away.
The sun shines on my heart again
and I am able to face a new day.
My smiles are real
my laughter genuine.
No matter the sorrow that I face
or the pain I try to hide
the sun always shines into my soul
and leads me back to light. Funny ObituariesWinna Race
Never has she won first place
In any sort of competitive race
She can never claim the winner's crown
Even though she tried every race in town
But on that bleak Tuesday in November
Or was it on a cold day in December?
When instead of the gas she hit the brake
And a hair pin turn she tried to take
Winna finally got first place in
A race we all hope never to win
Sadly in death her glory was found
Do you suppose it matters now she's buried in the ground?
Adam Baum
We have the H-bomb
(named for Harold as told by his mom)
And we know about the F-bomb as well
(credited to Frank, as he continues to tell)
But what about Adam, that poor man?
I don't think he has a single solitary fan.
Adam was a pilot, or so they say,
What if he had flown the Enola Gay?
The irony would be too much to behold
Would it have brought him fortune and gold?
But alas, we shall never know,
For poor Adam flew his plane into the snow.
He flew blindly until he ran out of gas
And thus this Adam Baum never came to


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I couldn't fit them all on, so there may be a second part XD
(I only do 20 because I'm lazy OTL )